*****

Two weeks left before June ended, I suddenly came to realize.

First kisses have various meanings and impressions depending on the person.

For example, there are people who think of kisses as a simple act of touching body parts and nothing more than that. But there are also people who think the opposite. (Of course I'm included in the latter category!)

It's when people think of kisses as something that changes their life.

But considering the condition of modern Japan, I think those types who get fussy over kisses are decreasing during this time.

Let's forget about that for now, because what we did before were kisses between friends, and I will insist that those are not counted as one.

Whenever I see Mai, my heart will squeeze. It makes me remember the sensation of her lips and the reaction from my body on that day, it's hurting my chest. I want to think of it as a mere imagination.

That's why.

"You are looking at her too much."
"Eh?"

Lunch break. The passing Satsuki-san was talking to me out of nowhere. I get surprised by her sudden words, was that directed to me?

"Did that woman do something to you? Your eyes look empty."
"That's..."

Satsuki-san throws her gaze toward the flawless beauty Mai.

"T-there's nothing wrong. I just thought that she sure is gorgeous too today, kind of thing."

Mai will begin her one week absence due to her overseas work starting today after lunch break. It became a hot topic for students in our class so she has always gotten surrounded since this morning.

From the center of attention, Mai is looking at me and shakes her hand with a thousand dollar smile, I received it for free.

She's an existence who gets a lot of attention just by existing. That is Oozuka Mai. Rather than simply having bewitching looks or graceful manners, her beauty can't be described by those common words. She has a mysterious quality that can captivate everyone just by being there. I think this is what they call [a natural].

Uuuh...I accidentally looked at her lips again. When I wanted to do a quick self-reflection, Satsuki-san talked to me again.

"Amaori, have you ever thought that it would be great if humanity turned into Oozuka Mai?"
"Of course not!?"

I reflectively let out a loud answer because that sure was an outrageous question. Satsuki-san doesn't really like noises so as expected, she frowned.

"Ah, sorry..."
"Nah, it's okay. Hey...you are being too depressed."

I was disappointed in myself for losing a point from Satsuki-san. She's very strict toward everyone so I'm always getting nervous whenever we talk together like this.

"What about you? Have you ever thought about that?"
"Rather than I had, I always think about it."

Huh, so there's also someone who thinks like that...Scary.

"Satsuki-san has been friends with Oozuka-san since a long time ago, right?"
"Well, yeah. I always thought that if I got to know that super darling a bit later, my personality would be a bit cheerful."

I don't really know what I should say, so it helps when Satsuki-san continues her words.

"Rather than friends it's more like...inseparable relationship...? When I'm sticking close with her, the moment she lets out an exasperated face, I will be able to see it."
"Eh, that kind of reason? Really?"

When I'm having a conversation with Satsuki-san, Mai finished her talk with the rest of the class and prepared to leave the school.

She brought her bag with her just like an elite businessman who was ready for their business trip.

"Well then, I'm off."
"Ah, take care."
"Yeah yeah."

We also wave our hand to send her off. Mai didn't give any specific eye signal when she left the classroom, don't get dejected, Renako. You are not a special existence, you are just a friend. I'm not dejected though!

And I realized.

"Could it be that Satsuki-san wants humanity to turn into Oozuka Mai so she will become an average person, and that would increase your chances of seeing her exasperated face?"
"...Eh?"

She looks surprised.

"Ah, no, I've just thought about that before."
"Amaori, you."
"Y-yes?"

My heart feels like stopping the moment she called my name. She's a different kind than Mai, but Satsuki-san's beauty is on the upper level in our grade. Her sharp eyes are narrowed when she looks at me.

"You have changed. Did something happen with Oozuka Mai?"
"Kaho-chan already asked about that before...Umm..."

Yeah! We kissed!

...As if I can say that. (※ That's a given)

"U-umm, well, a bit."

I played with my hair and avoided my gaze from her eyes. But she won't let me off.

"...You fell in love? With that woman? I personally advise you to not do that."
"No! Of course not! Never! Impossible!"

It's not me who fell in love with her, it's her who fell in love with me that it troubles me!

"Kaho confessed to her when we just enrolled."
"!?"

The shocking truth almost peeled my eyes off when my smartphone rang, there's a message. Ugh, it's from Mai.

[We won't be able to meet for a while and it makes me lonely. Won't you spare some of your time to meet me on the rooftop?]

Uh.

I timidly look at the screen on the top of my palm.

"Is it from Oozuka Mai?"

This person, does she have an ability to peek through others' vision?

"Eh!? No, I wonder, I don't really understand! It's probably from God!"
"...Were you always this interesting before?"
"Ah, I'm sorry since we are in the middle of conversation but I should excuse myself to the bathroom."
"Oh my is that so, I see, then me too."
"Why!?"
"Because I want to use a bathroom..."

Satsuki-san furrows her eyebrows like she's troubled by something, somehow it looks so natural on her, could it be, that expression is a mere act and she already discovered the truth behind our relationship...?

"Ah, it's alright now. It seems like I no longer have to go to the bathroom! I'll be waiting for you here!"
"Is it...? I'll go since I need to though..."

She's really getting suspicious over me, but due to my cleverness I successfully shake her off this time. What an accomplishment. Eh, but what if she really just needs to use a bathroom...


Anyway, why would Mai become this desperate to see me...For now, let's hurry to the rooftop.

I wonder what kind of hairstyle she used today, it would be best if she tied her hair...

The winds are pretty strong today when I open the door leading to the rooftop. 

A person is standing there, I only manage to see the silhouette of her back since the sun is also very strong today. Her flowing blonde hair is dancing around and she’s resting her body on the fence.

It's the opposite from the first time we met that day, but this time she looks like a gorgeous painting from my point of view.

"Hey, so you've come, Renako."

She turned her back and faced me, with the light behind her, she looked more dazzling than usual, it's bewitching. And then I realized.

"You let your hair down!"
"Aa, the wind feels good today."
"And of course you'd make excuses!"

I closed the door behind me and glued my back on the door without moving any steps.

"We-we are only going to talk! Don't misunderstand just because we are alone right now!"
"If you are being that frightened, it only works as a temptation for me, you know?"
"Hii!"
"It's a joke, a joke."

She grinned and then laughed at me, I'm not in the position to laugh, though.

She walked closer and I automatically stretched my hands out.

"W-wait! We’re at school, okay!? We can't do anything obscene on this holy ground where we seek knowledge, you understand?!"
"In short, if it's sacred behavior, it's okay, right?"
"[Behavior] is no good!"

But it's futile, in just a short moment she already closed the distance between us and grabbed my wrists. 

Her smile in front of me is more dazzling than the blue sky behind her.

"Y-you can't do this..."
"Why is that?"

Seeing these eyes, I feel like I won't be able to lie.


"Because...I ended up only thinking about you."


Her gaze on me is fiercer than the sun rays during June.

"I like you."
"I, I also like you...as a friend..."

She's wall-slamming me. Hiie!

I couldn't look into those eyes.

"Mai...It's time for your airplane..."
"I have a very skillful driver, you don't have to worry. Rather than that, I want to treasure the time we have right now."
"Uuuu..."

She brought her face closer right below my face, just like a spoiled dog who asked for attention from its owner.

It's ticklish, but...there were also other things, and I'm sure that it was because she poured me her sincere feelings through her touches and gazes.

"I-It's only for a week, you know..."
"If it was me from before, I would have thought that. But right now, whenever I can't meet you I have no direction and the time I spend feels longer. On top of that, we are in the middle of our match.
"I, I also thought that it would be lonely if I can't meet my friend! Hey, that's why, could you, please, get away from me. Hey, wait, house, house!"

I tried my best but this clingy dog won't listen to me.

"I see, so we have the same feelings. Fufu, this smells like Renako."
"Geez! You, fool!"

I tried my best to push away her face from mine, but she won't even budge even though I used all of my power.

"You are too strong..."
"It's the power of love."
"It's the muscle!"

She bit my ear, hii. My body loses all of its power.

"T-that's unfair..."
"You are cute, Renako. Aa, why are you so lovely. Hey, once we graduate, why don't we get married? Let's live together, I'll properly earn income for both of us."
"Proposing!? Right now!? With this timing!?"

I reflectively turned my head to her direction and she swiftly stole my lips.

Ugh. Her feelings and warmth are flowing from her lips. I feel like I no longer care about whatever happens when I taste her kiss, but...

I push her body and wipe my mouth.

"I-I already said that we can't do this in school!"
"Umu, you're right...even though I thought that I would end this in a proper way."

Unexpectedly she backed down and put her hand on top of her mouth.

"Since we had our kiss last time, I started to feel weird."

Mai's face became red. If that super darling got embarrassed, of course I would also get embarrassed.

"I can't stop thinking about you day and night, wanting to feel you more than this."

She placed her hand on her chest and looked down, her figure swaying in the wind, it's beautiful.

...Having kiss as a final borderline where it makes people conscious of their partner, it seems I'm not the only one.

Well, it's more likely that Mai felt that emotion much more directly than me.

Could it be that she likes me more than before!?

"I, I won't lose!"

I tried my best to declare my fighting spirit while she hugged me.

"I will make sure you understand that being friends is far more fun!"

She stroked my head gently.

"Well then, I'll go now. I'll get lonely for sure, but I'll endure."
"Aaah yes just go, hurry and go."

For the last time, she hugged me a bit stronger than before, and then smiled. After that she left the rooftop.


The bell rang, if this drags on, I will be late for class.

I leaned my body on the nearest wall and hugged myself, "Uu...it smells like Mai."

I groaned and pushed my hands on my face.

Aah, geez. Smelling the scent she left on my body, it makes me look like a maiden in love.

"Let's forget about Mai! I'll enjoy my own school life! I don't care about that forceful and egocentric person like that!"

After I realized that my yelling just now sounds like a pouting girlfriend, I stopped myself with an extra annoyance.


**


That night, we had a family dinner when Oozuka Mai appeared on the television. It's a small section of the news but it's a special program for Japanese models featured on Paris' Fashion Show. It clearly shows the part where she's walking on the runway.

Me and my mother had the same reaction, "Oo..." and then sighed with admiration.

"Father, that girl came to our house last time, you know."
"Eh...? Really?"
"Yup, she's a friend."

I boasted about it, but my sister who sits beside me is looking at me with half-closed eyes.

"Big sis...I know you are excited with your high school life, but for lying like that...As expected, I will no longer call you [big sis], I'll call you with [oi] or [hey you] if you are being like this.
"Ehh, but it's true."

My sister just took a side dish from the table while shaking her head.

"I’ve always been with Mai during school, you know!"
"Hey you, bring that mayonnaise over there for me."
"Eh already!? Wait, mother, you should say something!"

My mother placed her hand on her cheek and stared at the television.

"...Uuum, as I thought, it's very strange that someone like this came to our house, right?"
"Mother!? I understand, that's true, but don't twist the truth, okay!?"

No matter how hard I tried, the three of them were ignoring me and talking about how good today's dinner was. I can't accept this...

...Wait, it's not like it was that bad.

Once again I'm staring at Mai on the television, she really looks like someone far away, just a gorgeous model from a different world.

If it was me from my middle-school years, I'm sure I won't be able to call her out like that day. Forget the high-school debut, I was simply really brave back then...

Fell from the rooftop, went to the poolside, took a bath together, is that merely a dream, I wonder. Mai's existence inside television made her feel so alien and far away that I can't help but think of it like that.

Come to think of it, more than coming to our house, this girl just went ahead and kissed me, huh...

When I'm looking back at everything, once again I thought that everything happened between us might be just my mere imagination.

"What's up, you over there? Have no appetite?"
"Oh my, you over there, even though I thought today's karaage was well fried and good enough.
"Mother and father too!? You already met her, mother!"


***


The school when Mai isn't here has turned into a completely plain and mediocre, standard private high-school. Well, maybe this school only has a small distinction between the students in the first place, Mai was just too extraordinary. It feels like the brightness toned down one or two levels.

Break time. I stared at the rainy skies from my desk right beside the window.

The beauty who sits right in front of me, Ajisai-san, also rests her cheek on the desk lazily.

"I feel so sleepy, could it be that because Mai-chan isn't here today."
"That's true, and it's raining right now."

When I'm looking at the rain, it always reminds me of our Odaiba date where it led to our kiss. I breathe a heavy sigh.

"What should we do for today? Kaho-chan is also feeling down since Mai-chan isn't here."
"Aah, you're right..."
"Meanwhile Satsuki-chan is getting fired up with her study for this chance to beat Mai-chan during her absence."
"Haha...that's very like Satsuki-san."

Well then I guess that would lead to Ajisai-san who will get invited by another group to have fun somewhere.

It's been awhile since I feel like this. Since Mai is gone, I feel like a loner again...my stomach hurts.

Even though you always get tired whenever you are in the group, you don't want to be alone in this situation. Weak! But that's also the reason why I'm being a coward and can't invite anyone to hang out with me!

That's right...while she’s away I should show her that I can manage well without her...because at this rate, if I don't do something I will end up getting caught by her. Forever.

"H-hey, Ajisai-san."
"What is i~t?"
"If you are free for today, and of course if you are okay with it, want to go somewhere after school?"

I tried my best to form a smile, it ended up a bit stiff.

I bet she's busy so she will turn me down, but what I need right now is bravery to take a step ahead! For the sake of being freed from Mai's curse!

"Yup, let's go."
"Eh!?"

That's surprising, this is unbelievable...

Eh? A trap? Is this a trap?

Is this something complicated that people with communication disorder can't understand?

But Ajisai-san's eyes are filled with purity, and simply want to have fun.

"It's my first time going somewhere with just the two of us. It's rare for you to invite me first."
"Eh, well, uhm...rather than afraid to ask you out it's more like...you are too far above me?"
"Ahaha, what's with that. We talk normally, right?"

Ajisai-san has a lot of people inviting her out, and she’s always the one getting asked, so there's a waiting line for her. For me to skip that line and just normally hang out with her, since when did I receive a backstage pass?

"I feel treated like a VIP."
"VIP?"
"Well, it's just that you look busy since you get invited a lot almost everyday."
"Eeh? That's not true. Everyone was just being nice to invite me and I just tagged along because it looked fun. That's why, thank you for inviting me today, Rena-chan."

Ajisai-san smiled and bowed her head a little, the ears hidden by her hair. Ah, I'm being purified.

"Me too! It's my pleasure to be able to accompany you!"

With this I ended up going with Ajisai-san after school. 

Of course this is not cheating.

In the first place, can you even call this cheating since she's a friend!? I'm lost!


**


Since today I'm going to hang out with Ajisai-san, I was so excited. When homeroom ended, someone from my class was calling out to me.

"U-umm~ Amaori-san, do you want to go home together?"
"Eh?"

It surprised me, but on top of that.

"Like, would you spend your time with plain girls like us once a while? We also have days where we want to touch cute girls, you see!"
"Eeeh!? What is that, c-cute!?"

It's the calm Hasegawa-san and the cheerful Hirano-san. I think they are in the art and literature club. Since our seats are close we talked for once in a while, but still, eeehhh?

"D-did you just say cute? W-were you referring to me?"
"Eh, of course! Amaori-san is really cute after all! You have pretty skin, and a dazzling smile! The cutest in the world!"
"On top of that, Amaori-san seems easy to talk to, don't you think~ Even though she's from the upper caste she doesn't let out an intimidating aura."
"I-is that so?"

I got praised by Hasegawa-san and Hirano-san, they made a fuss out of me, I will get carried away like this.

The inside is a complete shabby character though!?

Uuu...but, I already made a promise with Ajisai-san today.

Even though I already told myself to keep smiling and never reject anyone's invitation, I feel heavy in this condition like I just drank two glasses of bubble drink...

I tried to explain the circumstances when suddenly,

"Re~na-chan, let's go."

Ajisai-san came with a huge smile.

"Ah, um, Ajisai-san, right now..."

Right after she arrived, Hasegawa-san and Hirano-san opened their mouth and they turned red.

"Uwaa, amazing...The eyes are so big...the face is so small..."
"Hieeee...a beauty...she's so close...crap..."

Eh!?

The two of them are completely fascinated by Ajisai-san.

"?"

Huuh!? Even though they said I'm the world's cutest!?

"We thought this was our chance since Oozuka-san is not here...but I see, we were being reckless..."
"We totally live in a different world...We're sorry, Amaori-san! We will never dare to talk to you again! It's okay! Well then!"
"Aaaah."

I stretched out my hand, but they quickly got away. They look like they completely regret talking to people from the upper caste!

Ajisai-san tilted her head questioning the whole farce.

"What happened? Did they need something from you?"
"Um, it's okay...let's go, Ajisai-san."

I turned my head and looked at Ajisai-san.

When I'm looking at her, she really looks soft just like a super expensive marshmallow. Could it be that I was the one who was being impertinent to ask her out like this...

"Ajisai-san must taste real sweet when bitten huh..."
"Eh, what was that, a horror story!?"

Even that surprised face is super cute.


**


Since there is a new release for cosmetics which we wanted to see, we both went to a department store located in Shinjuku.

My hand was pulled by Ajisai-san when we headed to the cosmetic floor. There's a lot of fashionable ladies on this floor, it makes me feel very out of place.

W-well, even I have an angel with me! O' angel, please guide this foolish human.

As soon as we arrived at the display, Ajisai-san compared two lipsticks on her hand with the same seriousness as when I chose what I should eat at the cafeteria.

Just like using a lightsaber, Ajisai-san put out the latest summer special lipstick and then she turned her body to me.

"Between this and this, which one do you like?"

Just like a scene where they’re in the middle of a date and the girl is trying to get the boy's attention, what a sly move! But when Ajisai-san did it, it felt so natural!

I only used something cheaper up until now, so I don't really understand the differences...

But Ajisai-san's question earlier is not [Which one will suit me more?] rather, she asked [which one do you like?] and I thought that was kind of amazing. Even though she could just choose the one based on her preferences...

"Eh, um, let's see...I think, the pink one..."
"Really? Actually, I also think that this one is better!"

Yeah! It was spot on! I did a victory pose inside my head.

Right after I snapped out of my merriness, I realized that if it's Ajisai-san, whichever I choose she would have responded with that...I seriously thought about that when I came into the second realization, I'm a completely hardcore shabby character, thinking about stuff like that!

Ajisai-san who's being cute with her smile since earlier called out to one of the storekeepers and received a sample. Hee, so even in department stores they have something like that, I didn't know.

"Since we are here, let's also do this with Rena-chan."
"Hah!?"

I still haven't reacted properly when she already made me sit in front of the mirror.

W-wait, I don't have that much money, you know!?

Ajisai-san who's having her lips done is looking at me through a sidelong glance, there's also a pretty lady walking toward my direction, and then she smiled.

Awawawa.

"What do you want for today? Should I put the same thing like the one with your friend?"
"Eh, um, well, I'm sorry, I didn't bring much with me for today..."

The lady laughed a little.

"I see, well then, what about trying out our latest product? I'll give you the sample, if by any chance you take a liking, please come again."
"I-I'm sorry for troubling you..."
"It's alright, it's alright."

The lady twisted the lipstick, the color is very pretty just like a diamond. While letting out a fine business smile, she put her hand on my cheek as support. Wa, wawawa...

"Do you like putting on makeup?"
"Eh? Well umm, I wonder...I usually imitate the ones I see from videos.   "

I thought I saw her pout, I wonder if I made her angry...

But the lady laughed again like rejecting what's inside my mind.

"Fufu, I see. You are very honest. Then, you might be our customer one day. Please do your best, and I will make you cuter from here on."
"Awawawa!"

I let the fired up lady play with me, and after she was done, she handed me the sample product. She finally released me.

Ajisai-san's lips look softer after she put on the lipstick, her smile looks more mature than usual.

"You sure went all out."
"Hahaha...she took a lot of care of me."

Ajisai-san who's just bought the latest lipstick is staring at me. When I saw her glossy lips, I unconsciously gulped.

"Yup, Rena-chan is really cute!"

When I receive a powerful praise from an angel, of course my cheeks feel like burning.

"Well that's because of the one who applied it, and the cosmetics are very good."
"In short, Rena-chan wants to get better at applying make-up, and then pick the good ones by yourself, then you will become cute?"
"N-no, no, that's impossible!"

I shake my hand vigorously, ah it's hot.

"Anyway, Ajisai-san you look so good with that...you will become unbeatable."

The cute Ajisai-san has become cuter, so this is how an angel who descends to earth looks like. 

Hearing my compliment, Ajisai-san let out a sweet smile.

"Ehehe, is it?"

While looking a bit embarrassed, her eyes are moving around. And then.

"Chu."

While pursing her lips, she threw me a kiss through the air.

Eh...Cu...cu...cute....

Ah I think my heart just stopped.

I took my phone out and held it strongly.

"Ajisai-san, once again! Just once!"
"Eh, you want to take a picture!?"
"You were crazily cute after all! It's okay, I won't show it to anyone! I will use it for my own fun in the house! Encore! Encore!"

Her face blushed once again and threw me a more moderate one, "Chu."

I took a video. I'll treasure this forever. I'm glad I'm alive. But I wonder if I crossed the line just now.

Whenever Ajisai-san is here, my heart always moves frantically just like doing sports and won't calm down.



After we were already done with make-up, we walked to the upper floor and looked around the stores.

Ajisai-san naturally holds my hand.

Eh!?

"Ah, sorry. You hate it?"
"Of course not, that's not the case...Eh, but why? Do you like me!?"

My inner thoughts are slipping out.

Ajisai-san looked at me with questioning eyes like she's saying, [Why are you asking me something like that?]

"I like Rena-chan though? That's a given."

Haaaaaa!?

The commotion inside my head is really dangerous. Because of Mai, every time I hear something like that I interpret it in a weird meaning, I think this is a curse. Moreover, the other party is Ajisai-san!

And we are holding hands right now. Her fingers are smaller than Mai's, she's so adorable that it troubles me.

Ajisai-san who's walking beside me looks happy, I always thought I would never have something good in my life, so I'm sure I must pay back for this amount of happiness another time.

"Hey, is it okay if I complain a bit?"

Ah it's here. Isn't this too quick? This is scary.

"Ah, sure, forgive me."
"Why are you apologizing?"

I make her laugh again. I was sure she would say [Rena-chan, actually I really think that I can't stand someone in our group and her name starts with 'R' and ends with 'O'. What do you think?]

"I told you that I have little brothers, right? So I always nag and scold them whenever I'm home."
"Eeeeh!? Even Ajisai-san can get angry?"
"Of course, actually I’m a ball of anger. They won't tidy their stuff, keep forgetting something, won't clean the bathroom even though it’s their turn. Also, whenever they play games they won't answer me."
"Big sis..."

Big sis Ajisai...haa it sounds great. I don't have enough courage to say it out loud, though.

"That's right. That's why once in a while big sis also wanted to go out and have fun with cute girls, and charge my girl's power, you see."

Just like a vampire, Ajisai-san showed her eyetooth and laughed. Cute.

"Eh but my girl's power is on the pico scale though..."
"Actually it's my first time hanging out in a department store with a friend like this, and it's fun. Thanks for accompanying me, Rena-chan."

Her hand is wrapped around mine while saying that.

Uwaa, I'll blush.

Wrong, wrong. She likes me as a friend, and we have fun as friends. Because she's an angel, she's very upfront with her emotions and she's a natural at making others happy.

That's why, this throbbing is my own fault!

What's with this feeling of wanting to steal those lips!

Do I like girls now...? I can't believe this...

"What's wrong? You suddenly stopped and hugged your head...Eh, could it be that you’re feeling sick?"
"No...it's just, I feel like I just found my desired treasure inside the dungeon, which I won't enter for the second time, and then mistakenly overwrite it with another data, or something..."

Since I said something like this, I should pay a hefty price for this soon, huh...

"Oo." A sudden voice from another direction. I raise my head.

"Sena and Amaori. In the middle of shopping?"

Huh, it's two hot guys.

No! They are our classmates, Shimizu-kun and Fujimura-kun. If my memory serves right, they are in the basketball and soccer club. In front of a tall, wide-shouldered, and well-carved handsome face, I automatically become a lump of nervousness.

If I can't handle girls well, what about popular handsome boys from our class? Of course I can't even talk!

Ajisai-san, who's still holding my hand, of course naturally talked with them without any fear.

"That's right. It's rare for two guys to come to this kind of place, though. Looking for presents?"
"Right right. Birthday present for this guy's girlfriend."
"Well, but I already know which one she wanted though. That's why, want to grab some tea together?"
"Eeeh, I wonder."

Ajisai-san answering their question with a smile plastered on her face. I let go of her hand and take a step behind. Ajisai-san is kind to everyone, so she probably would prefer to go together and ask me to join them.

Ah, somehow, when I'm looking at my empty hand I remembered that thing.

...I had something like this before.



It's from a long time ago, around middle-school.

Since the boys were coming, everyone wanted to hang out together, but I was nervous so I didn't know what I should talk about, so I rejected their offer.

And then the next day.

"ーAmaori, why did you reject our invitation yesterday? You were very conceited anyway so we would never ask you out again."

The me from back then wasn't scared or sad, I just smiled at them, I think. Looking at my behavior, the girl probably got more pissed.

The reason behind my lonely time during middle-school was that trivial thing.

Maybe that day she was in a really bad mood, is what I simply thought.

She was a popular figure in our class, so she asked everyone to avoid me. Rather than openly opposing her, I chose to go with the flow and act like I didn't really mind it. There's no one who cared enough to defend me anyway.

Until the day we graduated, I was always alone.

It's not like I want to make a huge deal out of these and call it a trauma, but since then, I really became mindful of people around me. For example: What do they think of me? Do I have value for them? I can't help but think about those.

And then I became extremely fearful to reject someone's invitation.

I'm not really good with the boys, it can't be helped.



This is okay. My date with Ajisai-san will end here and I will hurriedly go home and bury myself in my bed. That's not really a problem.

Rather than spending my next three years being alone again, this much is nothing.

If only Mai was here.

Just like always, she will pull my hand and come to my rescue, or so I thought.

I absentmindedly think about that.



I started to resent my own train of thought.

ーWhat am I thinking, that's not good.

It's like I'm using Mai for my own convenience. It's very different from the concept of the ideal friend I had in my mind.

A friendship without self-interests is what I wanted. If I rely on them whenever I'm on my wits end, I wonder just how weak my heart is.

It's frustrating. Indeed, Mai is an amazing person who can do anything, but this wasn't the case. If this keeps going on, I can't show her that being best friends is better than lovers.

She's doing her best in France right now, so I should be brave enough to reject their invitation on my own! (※ The scale is so different though!)

"Hey, Rena-chan, what do you think?"

Ajisai-san asked me in place of the other guys, so I took a deep breath.

Who cares about the past. Who cares about middle-school. I already changed.

Because in this school, I already found my true friend!

"I'm sorry! I can't really go out withー" (Bam)

I felt dizzy so I collapsed right there.

"Rena-chan!?"


*


It's a light anemia.

"Here, Amaori, drink a lot."
"Are you okay? Should we walk you home?"
"No, umm...Thanks for the offer..."

I hold the pocari from Shimizu-kun with my hands and take a rest on a nearby bench. These guys are so kind...

Even though I already prepared myself to reject their invitation, my mentality is too weak...

"Thank you, both of you. I will take care of her from here on, it's okay!"
"Is it? Well then, we will go for now. Take care."
"Eh? What's with that, aren't you being too cold?"
"...Fool. At this time it's best to rely on the girls. If we are here, she won't be able to relax."
"Ah, so that's the problem. Sorry, I was being insensitive. Well then, see you at school."

Thank you, Shimizu-kun, Fujimura-kun...Boys with bright personalities are kind...I'm sorry for being bad with you guys...

And the awkwardness keeps going on. It's just me and Ajisai-san now, I really feel bad for her.

"Umm..."
"I'm sorry, Rena-chan."

She beat me in apologizing. What does she mean? Would she say something like [I no longer have the confidence to befriend you]? Then it's the end for me, let's just cry my heart out later.

I steeled my heart for my own mistakes.

"Rena-chan is bad with boys right, or maybe it's strangers, I think. It would have been great if I took the initiative to reject them earlier. I'm sorry."

My cold sweat flowed down.

"Eh, but, well...I would have be okay if you just left me and went with those guys and had fun, you know?"
"That's not it."

I timidly said what I thought, Ajisai-san looked at me like she's scolding me.

"It would be meaningless if you weren't having fun, because today I came here with you."

She holds my hand, hii, it's soft.

"Today I came here to have a date with Rena-chan, right?"

She said something like that with a pout, and then she smiled. She pointed out that we had different things in mind, so I hurriedly apologize to her, "I-I'm sorry." 

But Ajisai-san seems like she has other things she still wanted to say.

"Do you understand now? That I'm not really a perfect beauty like you always thought."
"I-I get it."
"Really? Did it really get through you? I'm a selfish person who often gets angry, you know?"

She poked my nose lightly while saying that, I only managed to nod my head timidly.

Could it be that, like Mai, Ajisai-san is also tired with how others view her?

"I-I'll properly remember it."
"It's good if you properly understand. Fufufu, you see, whenever I scold my brothers, I'll also hold their hands like this. By doing this, those kids will get embarrassed and they will properly be honest and hear what I want to say. This is big sis' special secret technique."
"Properly hear what you say, this is..."

Forget being honest, right now I feel like the blood inside my body is flowing around rapidly, my heart is beating too fast it's scary!

"Anyway, how are you? Can you stand? What about walking?"
"Yeah, I'm perfectly okay now. I'm sorry to put you through that trouble."
"I see, well it's okay then."

She stood up ahead and then stretched out her hand to me.

"Let's go home for today, but we should have another date next time."

Her smile is bright. I can see the light from behind her and imaginary wings. Even though she's selfish and a strict big sister, she's still an angel for sure.



When we arrived at the area around Shinjuku Station, I looked at the advertisement for the game that just released. I stopped my feet and let out a simple reaction. Ajisai-san who walked beside me also looked at the board before me.

"So you play games, Rena-chan?"
"Eh? Ah, no, a bit!"

Ajisai-san took her phone and took a picture of the board.

"Really? Sometimes, I play these with my little runts, but the one who gets hooked by the previous version is me."

What was that?

When I realized what was going on, I already grabbed Ajisai-san's shoulders with my hands.

"I, I, I also...I also like playing games!"

Ha, what am I doing. Not good, I unconsciously behave like a creep. Even though we had the same interest it's not good to breathe heavily like this!

Even Ajisai-san would get uncomfortable if I acted like this.

"Hee, so that's the case, it's unexpected. I thought you don't like those kinds of things. Hey, what kind of game do you often play?"

An angel~~~~!!

During our way home, I keep talking like there's no end and make sure I won't get too carried away by her kindness. I also make sure to keep the topic general and not being too detailed with my explanations. Calm down calm down calm down calm down.

Ajisai-san listened to me like she's having fun.

And thenー

"Hee, so you bought that one. I also want to try it."
"T-then."

"I will lend it to you once I finish!" Is what I almost said but I quickly swallowed it.

"N-next time, would you like to come over?"

Just like earlier, I tried to be brave and invite her. When I did it, Ajisai-san narrowed her eyes and smiled.

"Is it okay? I'll go!"

Uwaa, I'm happy.

I thought that our outing today amounted to my lifetime luck, but who ever thought that I have another chance with Ajisai-san...Could it be that I already grasped the attitude of being a bright person?

"Ajisai-san, let's become friends!"
"We weren't friends all these times!?"


Mai, I'm sorry...When you are so far away below distant skies, I ended up making another friend...Fufufufu....


*****


Translator's Note
The cover for manga's first volume is out! Please buy a copy once it's available to support the author!



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For more detailed info about the novel, click here

Credit:
TL and everything else: Meatbun
Proofread: Mai88

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